How do we motivate her to get to the next level in sports? My husband and I try to talk to her about how competitive high-school basketball can be, and if she really wants to make a team she must work harder. She tends to "yes" us to death, but when we see her play we know she can do better. How should I approach her without being demanding or preachy?
I think you are pushing her to play better. You both need to question why this so troubles you. I think you have too much invested in her sports success. Let her enjoy the sport for as long as she can. If that means she gets cut from a school team, there are always other recreational teams she can play on.
Please take the pressure off her. Let the natural consequences of how she treats this part of her life evolve. There are lessons to be learned if we let our kids learn them, without blame or nagging. I'm very sensitive about this parent-child area because I've seen far too many kids of all ages suffer in silence because they feel they have let their parents down by not measuring up to their parent's hopes. Thanks for listening.