Ask Dr. Ana: How Can I Handle Daily Tantrums From My Triplets?

Question:

How to handle tantrums? I've got triplets and they are losing it on a daily basis multiple times a day. They're 4 years old and shriek like banshees! Any tips would be incredible, thanks.

Dr. Ana’s Answer:

Triplets! You definitely have your hands full. It cannot be easy managing the three of them!  

If the tantrum has already started, the best thing you can do is to make sure they are safe and wait for it to finish. Simply ignore it while it lasts. This is the best way to deal with tantrums because once the tantrum has started, your children will not listen to you. Also, because if you give in or pay attention to them, you are rewarding the tantrum and they will repeat it. Remember that they will repeat any behaviour, you reward.  

There are children that rarely have tantrums and others that throw them on a daily basis. This is partly due to their own temperament and due to how we handle the tantrums.  

If your children are throwing tantrums try these techniques: 

• Within reason, let them choose: at this age, children hear ‘no’ many times a day. Letting them choose (e.g., “Do you want to wear the blue or the red pyjamas?”; Do you want a banana or an apple”?) makes them feel more in control and will reduce the number of tantrums.  
• Be proactive: think ahead of them to prevent the chances of them throwing a tantrum. For example, do not take them to the supermarket just before lunch time or their nap. 
• Distract them: sometimes the best technique is to make them laugh: tickle them or play with them.  
• Be consistent: respond to tantrums always in the same way. Do not give in.  
• Be realistic: it is totally normal for toddlers to throw tantrums. It is a normal part of development. There is nothing wrong with them and they don’t do it to piss you off. This stage will pass.  

You may find this article useful: How to Deal with Tantrums 

I wish you and your children all the very best.  

Love,  

Ana 

Dr Ana Aznar 

Do you have questions for Dr. Ana? Ask for free today!

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