96 Halloween Jokes for Kids That Are a Scream!

Halloween is the perfect time to share not only candy and scares, but also some seriously silly jokes for kids. From tiny goblins to those teens and tweens who think they're too cool for knock-knock jokes (spoiler: they're not), there's a Halloween joke for every age and sense of humor. So, grab yourself some popcorn and get ready for some skele-fun!

Silly & Spooky Halloween Jokes for Kids

1. What do you call a friendly ghost?
   A boo-ddy!
2. What do little ghosts drink?
   Evaporated milk.
3. What is a ghost's favorite animal?
   An ele-phantom!
4. Where does a vampire keep his money?
   In a blood bank.
5. Why did the baby ghost cry?
   It had a boo-boo.
6. What does a witch use to do her hair?
   Scare-spray.
7. What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?
   I-scream!
8. What’s a vampire’s least favorite seasoning?
   Garlic!
9. What type of horses do ghosts ride?
   Night-mares!
10. Why didn’t the vampire bite the snowman?
    He got cold feet!
11. What’s in a witch’s favorite sandwich?
    Peanut butter and jelly-phant tears!
12. Why did the pumpkin cross the road?
    To get to the pumpkin patch!
13. What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween?
    Pillowcases!
14. Why did the zombie go to the library?
    He wanted something to sink his teeth into.
15. How do monsters tell their future?
    They read their horror-scope.
16. Why are spiders great online developers?
    They’re always on the web!
17. What do werewolves call their meetings?
    Howl-oween gatherings!
18. Why did the ghost decide to become an actor?
    He always wanted to put on a haunting performance!
19. What do you call a pumpkin that works at the beach?
    A life-gourd!
20. What’s a ghoul's favorite game?
    Hide and shriek!
21. How do bats say goodbye?
    "See you tomorrow fright!"
22. What’s a mummy’s best quality?
    They know how to wrap things up!
23. Why was the skeleton so calm?
    Nothing could get under his skin.
24. Where does a vampire take a bath?
    In a bat-tub.
25. What did the vampire say after reading your palm?
    "You're my type."
26. What is a ghost's favorite day of the week?
    Moan-day.
27. Why are cemeteries so popular?
    People are just dying to get in.
28. Why did the werewolf go to the party?
    It was a howl-o-ween bash.
29. What’s the problem with twin witches?
    You never know which witch is which.
30. I wanted to tell a skeleton joke. But I didn't have the guts.
31. My friend wants to be a zombie for Halloween.
    I told him he should be a-head of the game.
32. How can you tell if a vampire has a cold?
    He starts coffin.
33. What would you get if you mashed up a skeleton and a yeti?
    The a-bone-inable snowman.
34. What is a ghost's nose full of?
    Boo-gers.
35. Who did the ghost invite to his party?
    Anyone he could dig up!
36. Why do ghosts love elevators?
    It lifts their spirits.
37. What do you get if you cross a vampire and a teacher?
    Lots of blood tests.
38. Why did the Cyclops quit teaching?
    He only had one pupil.
39. Why don't vampires like fast food?
    They can't catch it.
40. What’s a mummy’s favorite type of pizza?
    One with extra tomb-atoes.
41. What did the zombie say to his friend?
    "Where have you been? I've been dying to see you!"
42. What do you call a lazy skeleton?
    Bone-idle

Halloween Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids

43. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Boo.
    Boo who?
    Don't cry, it's just a joke!
44. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Witch.
    Witch who?
    Witch one of you will give me some candy?
45. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Ivan.
    Ivan who?
    Ivan to suck your blood!
46. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Philip.
    Philip who?
    Philip my bag with candy, please!
47. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Ice cream.
    Ice cream who?
    Ice cream every time I see a ghost!
48. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Fangs.
    Fangs who?
    Fangs for letting me in!
49. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Howl.
    Howl who?
    Howl you know unless you open the door?
50. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Twick.
    Twick who?
    Twick or treat!
51. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Justin.
    Justin who?
    Justin time for Halloween!
52. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Interrupting ghost.
    Interrupting gho—
    BOOOO!
53. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Owl.
    Owl who?
    Owl be coming to your Halloween party!
54. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Frank.
    Frank who?
    Frankenstein! Now let me in!
55. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Orange.
    Orange who?
    Orange you glad it's Halloween?
56. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Dishes.
    Dishes who?
    Dishes a very scary costume!
57. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Watts.
    Watts who?
    Watts for dinner? I hope it's candy!
58. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Eddie.
    Eddie who?
    Eddie body home? I want some treats!
59. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Ben.
    Ben who?
    Ben waiting all year for Halloween!
60. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Scold.
    Scold who?
    Scold outside, let me in for some treats!
61. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Butter.
    Butter who?
    Butter get your costume ready!
62. Knock, knock!
    Who's there?
    Zombie.
    Zombie who?
    Zombie-body get the door already!

Frightening & Fun Halloween Jokes for Kids

63. What's a ghost's favorite type of street?
    A dead end!
64. Why don't skeletons fight each other?
    They don't have the stomach for it!
65. What does a skeleton say before dinner?
    Bone appétit!
66. What do you call a dancing ghost?
    A boogie man!
67. What's a ghost's favorite candy?
    Boo-ble gum!
68. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
    It felt crumbly!
69. What do monsters eat for breakfast?
    Ghost toasties!
70. What does a witch ask for at a hotel?
    Broom service!
71. What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
    A carrot!
72. Why did the ghost go to the party?
    To have a boo-last!
73. What do you call a vampire who's good at baseball?
    A bat boy!
74. What is a witch's favorite streaming platform?
    Twitch!
75. Why can't you trust a zombie?
    They're dead serious about everything!
76. What do werewolves do at the end of a movie?
    They give it two paws up!
77. What does a zombie eat for dinner?
    Human beans!
78. Why did Dracula become a vegetarian?
    He heard stake was bad for his heart!
79. What's a zombie's favorite cereal?
    Rice Creepies!
80. Where does Dracula keep his money?
    In a blood bank!
81. What do you get when you cross a werewolf with a sheep?
    A woolly bully!
82. Why do witches wear name tags?
    So they know which witch is which!
83. What do you learn in witch school?
    Spelling!
84. Why did the witch give up flying?
    She had a brush with death!
85. How does a witch tell time?
    With a witch watch!
86. What do you call a nervous witch?
    A twitch!
87. Why don't angry witches ride their brooms?
    They're afraid of flying off the handle!
88. What kind of music do mummies listen to?
    Wrap music!
89. What do ghosts drink at breakfast?
    Coffee with scream and sugar!
90. Why don't ghosts like rain on Halloween?
    It dampens their spirits!
91. What's a vampire's favorite ice cream flavor?
    Vein-illa!
92. Why did the skeleton go to the barbecue?
    To get another rib!
93. Why didn't the mummy have any friends?
    He was too wrapped up in himself!
94. What do Italian ghosts have for dinner?
    Spook-ghetti!
95. Why are vampires so easy to fool?
    Because they're suckers!
96. What room does a ghost not need in their house?
    A living room!

Scaring Up Some Seasonal Laughs

These Halloween jokes are guaranteed to bring smiles, groans, and plenty of laughter to your spooky season! After all, laughter is the best treat of all (well, maybe tied with full-size candy bars). Happy Halloween, everyone!

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