Talk to your step-dad and your brother and ask them what the best conditions are for listening. They may want you to tap them on the shoulder or say their name when you need to talk with them. It might help if you ask them to come into a quiet room and ask them to sit facing you. As silly as it sounds, you may want to set up an appointment with your step-dad to talk with him about something special, so he'll reserve that time just for you. When you want to tell him or your brother something, let them know something about the message in advance. For example, you might say: "I really want you to listen carefully because this is very important to me. There are three things I need to know from you. May I ask you now? The first thing is..." and so on. You might even want to consider writing messages to them on a piece of paper or a message board reserved for just that purpose. If they use email, that's another way to get their attention. Calling them on the phone (even if it's from one room to another) is a way to help them hear only you. The phone focuses your voice right where you need it to be (unless of course, there's a football game on TV).
Here are some books that might help you, your dad, your brother, and your mom. By the way, how is your mom dealing with this? She may have some pointers for you, too, or she may need this advice as much as you do.
- My Brother's a World-Class Pain: A Sibling's Guide to ADHD-Hyperactivity by Michael Gordon, Ph.D. (A story that helps families deal with ADHD.)
- Learning to Slow Down and Pay Attention by Kathleen Nadeau, Ph.D. and Ellen Dixon, Ph.D. (Illustrated with cartoons and contains activity pages to help kids learn how to pay attention and get more organized).
- Eagle Eyes by Jeanne Gehret, M.A. (A child's view of ADHD)
- Distant Drums, Different Drummers? A Guide for Young People with ADHD by Barbara Ingersoll, Ph.D. (written for children and adolescents, age 8-14. A positive view of ADHD)
- I Would if I Could: A Teenager's Guide to ADHD-Hyperactivity also by Michael Gordon, Ph.D. (A humorous book that looks at impacts on family relationships.)
- All Kinds of Minds by Mel Levine, M.D. (This is a great book for helping children and adults understand learning disabilities and attentional problems).