She seems to stand around and look for me to do things with her and having a three month old I just can't always be playing with her . She is perfectly capable of finding something constructive to do. She's not looking for attention....she has acted like this even before the baby was here. Also, should I feel guilty for telling her to play in the basement (it's finished) with her toys? I feel sometimes that I'm pushing her away and hope it doesn't have a negative effect on her. In other words, my child is lazy and how do I motivate her without breaking my back?
What about inviting over some other children to play with her or having her go to someone else's house to play? What about seeing if there's a play group you can join? It's not unusual for a 3 1/2 year-old to want to be around her mommy and the new center of attention. Maybe you could involve her more in her big sister role and have her "help" you with things you have to do for the baby. It's also great if you can find some time (maybe the baby's naptime) when you do special activities with her. Just keep engaging her, she's not lazy, she's just not interested in some things you think she should be. Don't be so hard on yourself. Good luck.