What subject(s) does this advice apply to?
Blending families
Communication between divorced parents
Easing emotional trauma
Establishing new routines

Describe the situation or problem.
This can be a very sensitive area. The kids may want all of you to be together, each parent may want to share the holiday with the kids, and, if there are grandparents and/or other extended family, they may also put pressure on you to spend time with their grandchildren.

What advice can you offer?
We defined major and minor holidays and agreed to alternate years so that our extended families had the opportunity to share holidays with our daughter. For us, the major holidays were Thanksgiving, Easter, Fourth of July, and Labor Day. We agreed to alternate holidays and switch every year. So, in the "odd" years, I had her for Easter and Labor Day and in even years, Thanksgiving and the Fourth of July. For other holidays, whoever was "parent on duty" on that day, had the children for that holiday.

Please add any additional comments or suggestions.
Once our daughter was a teen and working (and her dad lived an hour and a half away), we found that she was beginning to make the decision regarding how she wanted to spend her holidays.

This advice is most appropriate for parents with children in...
Preschool and Younger
Elementary School
Middle School