The description below was contributed by: A visitor, on Jan 04, 2001 08:20:18PM Suggestion Rating
What subject(s) does this advice apply to? Easing emotional trauma
Describe the situation or problem.
You and your ex can't stand to be in the same room together. Yet you know it's not good for the kids to be exposed to the anger and tension.
What advice can you offer?
Hard as it may be, you have to put your kids' needs ahead of your own. Always try to think how your words or actions might affect your children. It's your job to make them feel safe and loved.
In my case, my ex and I were able to put our daughter's well-being above our own issues (well, most of the time). Here's what we tried to do:
1. Always ask, what's best for her?
2. Keep your anger or hurt in check.
3. Keep lines of communication open between parents: use email or other written communication if you just can't talk without yelling.
4. Treat your ex fairly: don't ask him or her to do, or accept, anything that you wouldn't be willing to accept yourself. Be honest about this.
Remember what your mother told you: if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.
This advice is most appropriate for parents with children in... Preschool and Younger Elementary School Middle School High School & Beyond