Description of discipline technique:
I have three daughters -- two 7 year old twins and a 5 year old -- and we are still having problems with soiling accidents. One of the 7 year olds isn't too bad (although she still does it occasionally), but the other two are the worst. They usually handle urination all right, but rarely will they have a bowel movement in a public bathroom.

About three months ago, I just got totally fed up with cleaning up their messes. We were coming back from a Memorial Day picnic at a relative's house. It was a long car ride home and by the time we got there all three had done it in their pants and not one had said anything about needing to go. I was exhausted and looking forward to bed, but now I had three big-time panty-loads to deal with.

I cleaned them up first and sent them to bed. I think the last straw was the fact that I was still in the bathroom scrubbing out their underwear while they were in bed sound asleep.

The very next day, I laid down the new policy. "The only time Mommy is going to clean up pooping messes is if Mommy does one herself," I told them. I taught them each how to do it and now they are required to clean up everything themselves.

They get themselves a washcloth and clean clothes. They are responsible for wiping themselves clean, dumping out the load into the toilet, scrubbing their panties clean in the sink, and then placing the clothes in the laundry basket.

There was a lot of screaming and crying at first, but soon they realized that Mommy's days of cleaning up messy behinds and scrubbing out dirty panties were over. They soon realized that if they were too lazy to go to the toilet when they needed to, they would have a most unpleasant chore to do. Gradually, they have to realize that its a whole lot easier to simply use the toilet for a bowel movement than to have to clean it out of their underwear later.

It is taking awhile, but the new regimen is gradually paying off. In the past month, my 5 year old has only had three accidents, one 7 year old has only had two and the other 7 year old (the one that was always pretty good) hasn't gone in her panties in nearly three months. And as for me, I haven't cleaned a messy panty since Memorial Day.

Appropriate age group(s):
5 and over