One of my twins (11 years old)is self-conscious about having acne and is putting my makeup on before leaving the house. I have to leave for work early so I am usually not at home in the morning during their routine.
Two things concern me: Allie knows that I do not allow the wearing of makeup but, repeatedly continues; Also, Allie lies about it. I am seriously concerned about this for many reasons. What I am finding is that I truly do not know how to discipline her for repeadtedly doing something she does not have permission to do and the consistent lying about it. She's also taking and wearing a lot of both of her sister's clothes and then lying about it. Please help!
I would strongly suggest that you focus on the underlying reasons for her disobedience rather than on her lying. Show her some compassion and tell her you understand how she feels, especially if you had acne when you were an adolescent. Offer to take her to a dermatologist. There are many successful treatment approaches to acne today and most kids can be helped significantly with a dermatologist's help.
When you think about it, her lies are not malicious or attempts to hide something terrible that she has done. You might want to say to her, " Honey, I know that you must be feeling sad and discouraged about some things and that's what is making you tell these lies, put on my makeup and wear your sister's clothes. Let's figure out how you can feel better. I will help you in any way that I can. I know that you're a great daughter and that you don't like lying to me. I know that we can make things better for you if we work as a team." She needs your understanding and empathy, not your anger and blame for being a liar. I think that this approach will help turn things around. I'd welcome your feedback after you take this approach.