Your stepdaughter's obsessive relationship with food is obviously not about food. I suggest, however, that you have her examined to rule out any medical reason for her incessant hunger. She may be using food in response to some significant inner torment, perhaps her sadness and confusion about her biological mom's lack of presence in her life. She should definitely be in counseling, not only for her obsessive-compulsive relationship with food, but also for what is causing her to be in such emotional pain. She needs more help than you and her father can give her, and she is sending out these warning signs to show you how much she needs professional help. Please try to help your husband get over his aversion to therapy so that his daughter can get the help she needs. Letting things continue as they are does this little girl a great disservice. Thanks for writing.
Toddler and Teenager Expert Advice from Carleton Kendrick, Ed.M., LCSW