How do you connect with your kids? - FamilyEducation
How do you connect with your kids?
08/11/2008 at 18:29 PM

As a working parent, my husband often has trouble connecting with our sons -- he is too tired or stressed at the end of the day. One thing that has helped is listening to music together.

I found out about a singer, Brendan James, from a friend at umgd, and his song Green reminds me of when my youngest son was born - the piano is beautiful. I read that his album the Day is Brave comes out Aug. 26th, so I think buying that and listening to other music will connect my sons with their father.

Here's the Green video:

Do you ever use music to connect with your children?

I find that bath time is a great time to connect with my kids. They are happy in the bath and we play games and sing songs. If your husband is tired then it is easy enough for you to get them in and out of the bath and to do all the "boring" parts, all he needs to do is bring a stool into the bathroom and play games, sing and basically be silly. Of course bed time is also a great time, instead of reading you could do flash cards or look through photo albums. You didn't mention how late your husband comes home so I don't know if these are viable suggestions but I hope they help a little.

My 8 year old boy said to me in the car this week about my BF. "Mommy, Paul is a real good dad because he actually spends time with his kids and he's not just working all the time and too tired to play." Your husband can never get this time back. I'm not trying to be mean but being tired is an excuse and his children are more important than work - no excuses - How about the weekends? fishing is relaxing and just throwing a ball around does not take much time or energy. He should give himself the responsibility (just like his work) to do one activity with them EVERY day ... bathtime was a good suggestion or bedtime reading ... Don't let this time get away, you can't get it back!!!

Some of the things we do together are tell stories, look at photo albums, take walks and go to the park. My husband, too, comes home tired from work and often needs the nudge from me to play w/ the kids. One thing my husband does is wrestle w/ our kids on the floor. We have 2 active boys that love any kind of physical activity, so you can imagine how much they look forward to wrestling w/ dad after he gets home. It's their bonding time, and it's nice to see.

update: so we just found out that Brendan's album came out already, so once i got the chance to go out yesteday, i went to my local music store, and got it. OMG, i really enjoy listening to his songs. now one of my sons really wants to learn how to play the piano. oh goodness, what did we get ourselves into? LOL well just wanted to share this excitement with you guys.

This has been an interesting question for me over the last year. When my son was 3, his dad and I moved in together for the first time and I kind of just let his dad take over! Well, my son is now 10 and I left his dad nearly a year ago. I'm still trying to find out how to connect with him. He really likes playing video games and I just don't have the attention span for them. But, I try. I listen to his stories of Pokemon and whatnot. But what I found is actually working the most is going outside with him. Taking him to the park, throwing the football or frisbee around. Even more so, doing this with just him and I. Letting his sister stay at daycare a little extra or let her visit Grandma. Even more so, we (my bf and I) try to play games with him after we all get home and have dinner. My DS really likes card and dice games and loves that he was able to teach us a game called TRASH. We also watch movies together. We're half way through Mr. Magorium's Magic Emporium. (sp?). His behavior has gone from totally ignoring anything I say to asking me for advice. :o) As for his 2 year old sister, just playing with her is what keeps us connected. We often just sit around and watch her like she is the tv LOL. Our little entertainer.

I found that music was always great but as my daughter has gotten older, I found that between her schedule, my schedule and my husbands it seems that we are all too busy for each other. My best friend told me about the "Cherish Board game", that I since found on the website's blog at "Frowns are out, Smiles are in!" , and how it has really brought her family together. Well, we tried it and LOVE it. All it takes is about 5 minutes in the morning and we all leave the house feeling much better about ourselves and our family. My daughter's favorite space is the handwritten cards that I leave in her lunch box.

when me and my DH come back from work. we both are tired but we still play with our son and forget all the stress we had. we spend quality time with him as we know that our kid has been waiting for us the whole day long.

I too believe kids should come before work and I would like to suggest reading "From a Child's Perception". It's a wonderful book about everything children and finding a balance within the family unit! Its simply written and from the heart of a child, and the reviews read "inspirational", "a must read", "thought provoking", etc. I look forward to your take on the book. Please see my profile for details! Have a wonderful day!

Depending on the age of the child/ren, just something small is a great way to connect. For example, my son is almost 11 and enjoys video games, internet, gun movies and things that I just cannot get in to. However, I need to connect and communicate with him so I negotiate! I find something that we both enjoy and do it together. Because I work all the time and am always exhausted, it is usually a movie or a book. Even just a random hug, kiss on the cheek, how was your day makes him feel really good. Simple questions too! Many people feel that in order to connect with their kids, they need to go out on the town for hours and live it up! Not true! Sometimes less is more! Coach Ann & Mom of 2

As parents, it is our responsibility to spend some quality time with our children. Parents who put efforts in spending considerable time with their kids are more likely to raise smart, confident and compassionate kids.