I have a long story and apologise now for its length.
I met my husband in 04 on an internet website where we communicated
for a while, we actually met for real three times last year when he came to the
I knew it was going to be hard and I was told I was a fool for thinking that the girls would accept me…im not expecting miracles, if a ‘real mum’ doesn’t get respect during the teenage years, how can I expect it…being a step mum? These girls have had nannies and house keepers all their life and this is how they think of me, I feel like I am banging my head because I am constantly picking up after them, cleaning after them…I know…this is what a mum does…but, when I ask them for help I am being mean for interrupting their tv time.
The eldest daughter is so up her dads arse that it is driving me insane, we never get any time together she is either banging on the bedroom door, phoneing him or texting him every 5 minutes. She goes everywhere with him and sometimes it seems like it isn’t me who he married, he talks to her like the adult and most of the time I am going nuts craving for adult conversation, I know no one here and I cannot work (previously I knew lots of people, had a good job, my own place blah blah)…it isn’t that I miss what I had…i don’t…it isn’t that I am jealous of my husband/daughter relationship…far from it…but I can see that the way she is with me, bitching me to her friends and family and even the neighbours that this is going to get worse if it isn’t sorted out now…my husband thinks I am clueless with kids because I have none of my own and he has ‘single handedly’ brought up his girls (with nannys help of course) he thinks I have no idea how conniving and deceitful teenage girls can be, when it is he who thinks his girls are angels…they push me to the limit and expect not to be told off for it. I have no say on anything the eldest does yet we agreed a couple of weeks ago that we would start to discuss them more, and if they don’t do as they are supposed to do (which is simply keeping their room tidy and taking out the trash) then they will have some kind of punishment…not locking in the cellar or anything like that…but say loosing the ipods, mobile phones or pc, (btw these girls have everything a child could ever want so I am at a loss at to which to remove first!!) the younger one I hardly need to mention here as I thought she was the one who was going to be a problem it has turned out that it is her older sister who is the bratt. I ask her to do something and get slamming doors or storming off sulking, where she will then call her dad and tell him what is going on.
She started her first period last month and i am not to know anything about it, yet she expects me to buy her the things needed for this month, I know and don’t expect her to come to me telling me her problems, but when she told the neighbour instead of her dad or even her aunt, it kinda upset me because she felt she couldn’t come to me. The pair of them are lazy and inconsiderate, thinking that daddys wallet is always open…want want want and I cant get used to that…coming from a home where we had nothing and had to work for anything, everything is given to these girls on a plate and they have no idea how broke we are just feeding their habits of webkins and electronics.
They wont eat what I cook…im not a bad cook, but when we have burgerking or macdonalds half a mile away there is the better option…they will waste what I put on the table at 6pm and then complain at 7 that they are hungry and daddy will take them to macdonalds….this I also cant grasp…fast food. They don’t understand that everything I do is for a reason and that I am only trying to help, the youngest has ADD and I am trying to sort her diet, it is somewhat improving and she can see this, but her sister trys so hard to influence her into having things she shouldn’t have (in the sweets section)
The husband/wife relationship is strained enough as we didn’t have that chance that most couples have…the getting to know you period…we had our relationship online, then we were ‘thrown’ together and this was when we started to get to know each other as a couple…we didn’t have that chance previously to me landing here…it was all chats and webcams. I had never been married before and this isn’t what I was expecting…just to be here to be a cleaner and someone the kids can walk all over when it suits…
I will put money on the eldest daughter being the one who manages to split us up.
once again sorry for the length, and sorry for it being a bit mixed up, i have tried to describe as much as i can in the time i have while my husband is at work.