I'm sure a lot of you out there have dealt with this, but here it goes. My husband and I have custody of my 2 stepdaughters 11 and 12. We also have a 16yr son together(that's another story) and a 10 month daughter. Everything I gripe about with the girls not doing like homework, chores and other stuff. He feels that I am purposely trying to ketch them doing something wrong. I gripe about our son too when he does stuff wrong. My husband always feels I'm being way too hard on the girls. With grounding, taking away their cool clothes and making them earn them back. I've been in their lives since they were 2month and 2 yrs old. They've lived w/ us since 4/05. I always tell him I treat them as if they were my own. I don't normally ever refer to them as my stepdaughters and always introduce them as my daughters. I love them very much, but my husband and i are constantly fighting over this.