clinging daughter at age 12 - FamilyEducation
clinging daughter at age 12
03/21/2011 at 20:03 PM

My daughter is a loving young woman at the age of 12. She tends to want to cling to me everywhere we go. I can go for walks with her, go swimming with her along with her brothers or even have a boyfriend; yet she wants to cling to me. When I mean cling, I am talking about wanting to give love (hugs and kisses). I don't mind getting hugs and kisses from my child, but there is a time and place for it. When at the YMCA swimming, she wants to give hugs and kisses to me in the pool. To me it is not appropriate, but how do I address this with my daughter that at the age of 12 she can't be loving all over me, her mother like she wants to. I stopped dating because she was always getting jealous of whoever I was dating. What do I do? I understand she wants attention and love. I try to give her that. She is the best little girl ever, but some of the times she decides to give hugs and kisses is just not appropriate. Yet she seems to always want to be in my face wanting love when I have just sit down to eat. What is the best way to talk to my daughter about the way she acts without pushing her away? I don't want her to get hurt or channel her attention in the wrong direction?

Giver her a nice big hug when you greet her in the morning and another when she comes in the door from school. Walk holding her hand in public, or with your arm over her shoulder or around her waist. Stroke her arms and face when you tuck her in at night. Tell her "Your swimsuit feels cold to me. Please hug me after we are dry and dressed." Tell her "I'm hungry when I sit down to eat. I would be happy to hug you when we are cleaning up."

I agree with mayamay. Enjoy it now while you can. My daugther was like this and she was big for her age. I felt as you do in public. She is now 16 and doesn't fdot his anymore. I miss all the hugs and kisses.