Daughter (5) being ostracized/bullied
09/18/2012 at 15:19 PM

I would greatly appreciate some advice from other parents regarding my problem:

In July last year my daughter started at a new preschool, she befriended a little girl that she became smitten with. I became very confused when my daughter came home one day saying that she is not allowed to play with that little girl, I thought maybe because they were in different classes the teachers were trying to keep them in their separate groups. I couldn't understand why this girl's mother was always so rude to me whenever we crossed paths (she would look in the other direction and ignore me completely, even if I greeted her). When my daughter went back to school this year the same thing happened; eventually when I had a meeting with the new teacher did I found out that last year, I'm not sure exactly how it happened, when the two of them went to the toilet my daughter showed her friend her private and the mom of this child told the school that she didn't want my daughter anywhere near hers. No one told me at the time and I feel so embarrassed for how I went on in complete oblivion.

I tried to take my daughter out the school but they convinced me that it would have a bad effect on her school work to change her so I didn't take her out but I've noticed how she is being ostracized because she can't play with her friends on the playground if they are anywhere near this other girl. I think it is so unfair that she is being punished for almost a year for doing something that most children do when they are 4 years old.

It also seems that this little girl is bullying her by being straight out nasty & spiteful; like, if my daughter plays with another girl this girl will deliberately snatch up my daughter's new friend and shame my daughter in front of the other girls by reminding her that she is not allowed to play by/with her. So, my daughter has to go off and find someone else to play with.

My daughter comes home feeling so rejected and my heart breaks for her. I've told her not to go anywhere near this other girl but I think she keeps hoping that things will change and one day she'll be allowed to play with her old friend.

There's only 2 & half months left of the school year and next year she'll go to a new school but after a whole year of this anguish I don't know how we're going to cope. I would take her out the school but she says that she wants to stay so I would appreciate any advice on how to get through these next 2 months.