pre -teen and diapers
07/08/2007 at 12:55 PM

hi my pre teen likes to wear diapers hes twelve

got any ideas to make him stop?

Hey lonedad,

 

Welcome to the boards.  It is not normal for a 12 year old to want to wear diapers.  I would talk to his doctor and I would also get him counseling, I would say more is going on here than just liking to wear diapers.

 

Marti

 

http://www.familyeducation.com/home/

cid
931

It might not be "normal" but it is actually fairly common. In the past parents & the child have been reluctant to speak about the situation publicly. The internet has changed that & there are countless websites on the subject (some are very helpful, others QUITE questionable). At your sons age he most likely gets some sexual gratification from wearing them. Just like if a person was gay or crossdressed or was arroused by feet or whatever, a GOOD counselor would be able to make them feel better about themselves but you can't counsel away a persons sexual make up. You can try behavior modification & unenlightend doctors & counselling, it wont stop him from wearing them. It will make him hide wearing them from you & force him to lie to you about it. It might even give them an added mystique, so the forbidden aspect makes them even more attractive. You can find countless testimonals from teens going through this & adults whose parents went that route. Wikipedia's diaper entry & http://understanding.infantilism.org
are good places to start finding information.
30 years ago I was an almost teenager who liked & wanted to wear diapers. Let him wear them! It's only a diaper! Accept that it is part of who your son is. Don't make them a reason for you to embaress your kid or telling him he's immature. Tell him you'd rather he didnt, but if that's what he wants he can. That way you both can get a little more comfortable with it. he'll be more likely to be more open with talking about his sexual feelings with you & if you arent fixated on it you might be able to give some fatherly guidence into something that interests him more, before he gets fixated on them.

cid
1068

hey there I'm new to the forms, but as for your kid wanted to wear diapers honestly I don't see a problem with it, I mean think about it the only diffrence between diapers and underpants is that your able to wet one. maybe the child is scared of growing up. or is having trouble accepting things as they are in school or something. I'm not psycologist but I don't think having a liking for a diaper is anything bad. seriously whats wrong with wear a diaper weather your 1, 12, or 120.

cid
1407

you should feel lucky if thats all your 12 yr old is in. be glad its not drugs or something. i say if he wants to wear diapers whether or not its normal let him.

cid
4197


Wearing a diaper is not what most 12 year old boys do, so no that's not normal.  Being normal is not necessary to growing up healthy and happy.  However, I do think you should consult your doctor to get some feedback from an expert.  Is your son otherwise developing mentally and physically as "normal"

cid
4218

I would be worried about him getting or keeping friends as this is not in the least 'normal' How does he get on at school and does he have any friendships. He needs some sort of counselling.

cid
4221

I disagree with the people who claim that a 12 year old wearing diapers is abnormal. What, as the subject of this post asks, IS normal?

I will speak from my own childhood here. When From when I was six until I was nearly 16, I wet the bed. Not nightly. I would call it 40%-50% of the time. I also day wet at about the same clip until I was close to 10 or so. I had two choices, really. Wet my pants, and subject myself to bullies galore...or wear some form of protection. I chose protection. At first, it wasn't diapers, I wore training-style pants, both day and night. As I got older, however, I switched to adult size diapers (at about age 13 or so). I wore them to bed every night, and to be honest with you, I felt peaceful in them. Like I didn't have a care in the world. Like a baby, I suppose. As for daytime, I would occasionally wear a diaper, but only at home, and only around family (my parents and my sister, all of whom could care a whit what I did so long as it wasn't illegal. They loved me for me). Of course, before I was allowed to do it (wear during the day, I mean), my parents and I had a long talk, and discussed why I wanted to wear them, and set some rules to follow about them.

Now, I ask this. Did wearing diapers as a child, and onward to young adulthood, make me abnormal? I was a straight A+ student, made the High Honor Roll in high school during 3 of my 4 years (I missed a quarter of my sophomore year with mono, and my grades slipped a little). I was a varsity football player, and made All-County three times. I remain the only two-year captain in the history of my school. I also played baseball, though not as well as I did football. I went to college after high school, and graduated a year early with a degree in business. I am now 34 years old, and am a happily married father of two sweet and God sent daughters. As I look back on my childhood, I often ask myself "If I could go back and NOT wear diapers from time to time, would I?" And the answer is...not a chance in hell.

And if either of my daughters, when they are older, express an interest in wearing them, I will tell them it is their decision, not mine. I will, of course, lay down ground rules, like my own parents did for me. Like no wearing in public, don't go around advertising the fact you do it, and if you, ahem, use them, you are responsible for your own clean up.

Lonedad, what I am trying to say to you is this. Talk to your boy. Ask him, honestly, without condemning him right off the bat, why he wants to wear them. In my research, sometimes a child who wants to wear a diaper, especially if they haven't previously showed an interest in them, or if they don't have a medical reason (like I did, I guess) for the usage of them, it may be an indicator towards some other problem. Is he bullied at school? Has he recently gone through a change, a major (or major to him) one. Has someone passed on he that was close to? Your son wanting to wear diapers may simply be a way for him to let you know he's overwhelmed by whatever is going on. I wish you and your son the best of luck.

Best wishes from a former diaper lover,



Miniz74



cid
5620

Hi! lonedad.
If you set your son down and tell him that wearing diapers at his age is not normal. But that there are usually something causing one to decide to wear diapers or do something which is out of the normal range of behavier. Be calm and let your son know that you wish to discuss his desire to wear diapers. If after a real discussion on the subject,your son decides he still wants to wear diapers. Then you should back him 100%. If he wishes to be treated like a baby then do so as much as possible. But never embaress him about this problem. I because of dicease have had to wear diapers and plastic pants most of my life. I've had to come to terms concerning this problem and dealing with the public. I finally accepted the fact that I have to wear diapers for others sake as well as mine.

Your son does not have to wear diapers but does so because he wishes to. Allow him to do so and most likely he will grow ot od this. But if he does not then what the harm.
This is better by far than doing drugs or something of that nature. Have him go on line and chat with other teens who wear diapers and maybe he and you can sort this out.

cid
5642

hello i am not a parent but medically incontinent due to the lack of oxygen when i was born my bladder and my eyes were not fully developed. I was in your son shoes when i first started to notice i had a problem with accidents. I was ashamed to tell anyone and when i was 14 went to the drug stoe and bought some disposables for the first time my step dad found them and i could not tell him the truth because i did not understand what was going on with my body and could not face it when i was younger did not want to go to the doctor and run tests and find out that i had to wear them in school i just kept it to myself because i allready had it hard enough in school being in special education classes. So i would just talk to him and see if he has a wetting problem and go from there bye for now chrism.

cid
6267

Chris who said to much O2 at brith caused him to incontint does not know what his talking about. He is just some one who wants to be an adult baby. Thats OK if thats what he wants but he should tell the truthand not lie about it. He has made the same claim on other adult baby wetsites. To much O2 at brith can cause a baby to be blind but not to be come incntinent for life.

cid
6561

jwededrick, do you know for certain your facts before you write off what someone has said? We are all entitled to have our opinions and ideas listened to. Lack of oxygen at birth can cause a lot more problems than blindness. Perhaps you should do some research and blind us with your knowledge. [sorry, no pun intended]

cid
6567

our daughter is 13 and a bedwetter and wears cloth diapers and rubberpants[plasticpants]to bed at night.she got started on cloth diapers last year when she was 12.she made her first communion and had to wear a cloth diaper,rubberpants and tights under her communion dress because of the parrish requirements.she liked wearing the diaper and rubberpants and started wearing them to bed at night without our knowledge.she kept them between her mattress and boxspring.she started wetting in the diaper at night and now likes wearing them for that reason.she knows she con stop but doesnt want to.we have punished her by making her wear the rubberpants and tee shirt around the house and under dresses to mass but it didnt work.so now we are stuck!

cid
8062

You take the things away from her that you do not want her to wear. The only way you are "stuck" is if you allow yourself to be. Who runs your household, the kids or the parents?

cid
8063

Were do you live and what kind of church is that? This is a new one on me since when does a church care about what kind of underwear you have. At least not in the last 50 years.

cid
10639

Wearing diapers is not a bad thing. i have seen many comments from people saying the same thing, but they are mostly older and I figured you might want a viewpoint from a younger audience as well. I'm 18, and have worn diapers since I was 14 for personal reasons. Why is not really important here, my parents reaction is a bit more to the point. My parents have beaten me, screamed at me, and even threatened to kick me out of the house. This has NOT stopped me from wearing diapers. If your child really wants to wear diapers then honestly you have no bigger chance in getting him to stop than if you were trying to get him to stop being gay. It may simply be who he is, and that is ok. My parents have finally grudgingly accepted that i wear diapers, by the way.

Before i started wearing diapers i was getting mostly Ds in school. Now, my senior year of highschool, i am in many honors/college courses, and have a 4.0 for the year so far. I got a 1340 on my sats for the math and reading part, and a 2030 with the added writing section. I will be going to college for a dubble major in math and physics, and i intend to get a PhD in astrophysics eventually. Some of my better friends know I wear diapers, and they are tine with it. At your son's age I would strongly advise him not to tell any of his friends, but honestly there is little harm in wearing a diaper. Thank you for taking the time to read this, I hope it helps, and am sorry for any spelling errors... I've never been any good at spelling.

cid
11142

Thank you for being so open and honest with us. I am glad that your parents finally accepted who you are. Just a pity they had to beat you in the process.
Good luck with you PhD in the future. I wish you well.

cid
11164

Actually Seath, the reason why one wears diapers is quite relevant. If one suffers from a medical condition which limits their ability to gain control over their bowels, or renders them completely unable to control their bowls, that is a sad and unfortunate medical condition. This condition would leave most people no choice but to wear a diaper. On the flip side, if we are talking about those who wear diapers because it sexually arouses them, they want to act like a baby, or because they are just too lazy to walk themselves to a bathroom, then no, that is not normal.
I find it hard to believe that strapping on a huggie somehow released the intellectual side of you that had been yearning to come out. I find this to be a convenient excuse that you use as a way to justify your obviously chosen lifestyle. As for your parents “beating” you, there are two sides to every story. What most kids will describe as a beating is usually corporal punishment, they are not the same. Your assertion that you cannot change someone from wearing a diaper just the same as you cannot change someone from being gay is not a valid argument. Homosexuality is not an item you can purchase from a store. What did those who were predisposed to wearing diapers do before diapers were invented? They knew they wanted to wear something, but just didn’t know what? I think most gays would find your analogy flawed, and may even resent that you grouped them with a fetish rather than acknowledging their sexual predisposition.
It is safe to say that your “advice” is unsound and biased. Misery loves company.

cid
11201

Go, SnglDad! The 7 y/o I care for has a serious medical condition and wears a diaper to bed only. Doctors have suggested she wear one 24 hrs, but the parents and I are willing to remind her multiple times rather than let her become dependent on the diaper.

Seth seems like he has some sort of a fetish and is searching for any excuse to justify this behavior.

cid
11205

Corporal punishment goes too far when your mom starts beating you for made up charges, because she had a bad day at work, or because she figues you must have done SOMETHING wrong in the past three days. That is not corporal punishment, that is abuse. As to why I wear diapers... I will not tell you the whole thing because my sob story is not one i will shair with anyone i do not know. However, I was raped when i was 9 by my cousin, i was bullied, pushed around, attacked, and was the subject of multiple attempted murders at school. So it seems pretty reasonable to me that I might have SOME reason for my actions. I AM gay, so whereas i do not speek for the whole gay community, i personally find my analogy to be relivent, at least for me. My grades did not improve because i wore diapers no. That is not what i ment when i posted my comment and in retrospect i can see where you may think that. I posted that to show that whereas i wear diapers, i did not turn out to be a braindead loonywho will spend their life working at MicDonalds. I honestly can not sleep if i do not wear diapers. It isnt because i wet my bed, but it just is the way it is. Ive tried sleep meds, and they definitly make me tired, but i still dont sleep. Yes, you could view my diaper-wearing as a fettish, but dont be so closed minded about the possability that it could be more than that. I am sorry if i have offended your views on life, but honestly you cant just strongarm your way through life.

cid
11219

Seath, to sit here and point out every one of the discrepancies between your posts, is not something I wish to do. The one thing I will point out is that you stated those who wear diapers were somehow predisposed to doing so. You now provide a list of horrors, each individual one could cause most people sever psychological stress. After listing these terrible events you then go on to say “So it seems pretty reasonable to me that I might have SOME reason for my actions”. This statement contradicts your assertion that one is predisposed to wearing diapers. This statement also suggests that those who continue to wear diapers outside of a valid medical reason may have suffered some degree of psychological trauma. This trauma could be the explanation as to why one would revert back to wearing a diaper. As infants we were quite vulnerable. This was a time that our parents, hopefully, took special care of us and made us feel safe and secure. As we get older we may encounter situations, or environments that make us wish to feel that same safety and security. I believe this is why some adults continue to wear diapers; they may feel a certain amount of security from doing so.

I am not closed minded when it comes to an adult wearing a diaper. You gave no medical reason for doing so, and as terrible as you may want us to believe that your parents are I have a hard time believing that they would beat you for wearing a diaper if you had a valid medical reason. I was merely responding to the information that you offered.

You are young Seath. I truly hope that you are able to work through your issues and move forward in life. I am glad that you have a plan for continuing education, and some very challenging goals, I hope you are able to achieve every one of them. Good Luck.

cid
11228

Yoy really should not worry about this. Just think....he could he could be getting into trouble or using drugs. As long as his grades do not suffer because of this I would even help him get his diapers. If you tell him no he is just going to hide it more.

cid
11307

So let me get this straight; are you suggesting that because he is wearing diapers this has somehow kept him from experimenting with drugs? Or, are you implying that children can only develop one vice at a time? As parents we should not accept anything that we believe to be harmful to our children. By suggesting that there are worse things he could be doing, you take the focus off of the issue at hand. Using your “logic” we could dismiss a murderer who has only killed one person because “Hey, he aint no Ted Bundy”. Try looking past the surface and realize that this may be symptom to a larger problem.

cid
11313

double print.

cid
11314

As a diaper wearer, I can empathize with those who do also wear them. There are many aspects of my life which society would consider strange, to say the least. As I was raped when I was little, the things I do, I guess just give me that little bit of security that I lost. Because, in addition to diapers, I also take enemas on a daily basis. Subconsciously, I guess, I'm trying to clean out the filth that was forcefully put in me! So whatever you do, DONT! alienate your son, because he just might stop speaking with you in the future. So please don't let that happen!

cid
12932

Lonedad,

Is there a possibility that your son is being bullied at school? Could it be that he doesn't want to use the school's bathrooms?

I would discuss this with his doctor and see what he/she suggests.

Maybe your son really doesn't know why he is wearing the diapers and counseling could unveil maybe the problem.

I, personally, would want to seek out the reason he is doing this.

Good luck.

Only

cid
13000

there now bad reson they mite just like it that a bad thing

cid
14908

Ok, i was a diaper lover at that age, my parents found out and made me stop, becuase of that, i cant stop thinking about them and buying them so tell him you know, tell him ull leave him alone about it unless he wants talk, and if you think that making him stop will get is mind back on school and family, YOU ARE WRONG. trust me, after i was forced into stopping i went from an A+ to a C-

cid
15135

Fing Fang, pish posh.

cid
15157

there is nothin to worry about. if your son wants to wear diapers then support him. at this age it may seem like its weird but its not in fact its completly fine. just don't let him wear thim in public or it may cause some unwanted attention. or school. if he dosen't outgrow the diaper stage then ask your doctor but DO NOT TELL HIM right away.
the only really problem about diapers is that if he wears them all day for to long it can and will weaken his blader controle and he won't have any controle over it for awhile, but y can get the controle back. it just takes alittle. oh and if should keep asking once in a while if theres something he needs to talk about then tell him that he shouldn't be scared to tell you ro a doctor. or counseling. but DO NOT create nagative attention on your son. hope this infomation helps along with everyone else.

cid
16799

im 28 and have wear diapers day&night
you kids need woopins !

cid
24497

All children learn about controlling their bodily functions at their own pace.

Unfortunately, popular parenting advice is to "toilet train" them. Often the "training" is done before the child is physiologically ready and can result in trauma surrounding toileting. This situation is made worse by "competitive parents" and ill-informed parents wishing to make things easier for themselves as early as possible.

Given the above, the wearing of diapers is perhaps more likely due to some trauma than the child still not having learned when he needs to go. I do agree with two things mentioned by others:
- some form of professional help may be desirable (both parents and child)
- any force or humiliation/shame will have an undesirable effect.

I have no intention of being judgmental here, but whatever the reason, your son needs you to accept him as he is, and say you do or do not understand but are willing to talk if he wishes to talk.

Matt

cid
24510

Your son is twelve. There is a multitude of reasons that he may be wearing diapers. Maybe he started wetting the bed. Maybe he finds them sexually stimulating. Maybe he just likes it. Personally, when I was around twelve my parents found out that I was interested in adults who wear diapers, I wasn't evening wearing them, I still don't, but I am interested in that lifestyle (for lack of a better word). They also found out about other lifestyle interests that I have. I was beaten-and I mean bruises that didn't go away for weeks-verbally abused and publicly humilaited. They did not make me stop, or change my opinion, other than my opinion of them. I'm older now, and they no longer mention it, but I still find myself frightened of them at times, and don't think that I will ever have the same relationship that I had with them when I was younger.
You will not change your son. He is who he is, and even if he is not "normal" by your standards, he is not alone. You don't have to take part in his diapers, but you will not be able to force him to not wear them, or want to wear them. And, if you try, you may find that your son stops sharing his life with you and/or trusting you, and, from experience, that is painful for both parties. I cannot count the number of times my family has appologized, and tried to reforge the bond that was lost, and I want to as well, but on a base level, I cannot. Sometimes things cannot be undone. Don't make that mistake if you really love your son.

cid
24575

hi im 12 and i loved your post on diapers and i love to wear diapers but scared to tell my parents to let me wear diapers and their the type to humiliate me wearing them. any advice about how i should tell my parents to let my wear diapers? thx, rylan

cid
24591

Why stop him?
Diaper wearing at his age might be different and not "normal" but why does everyone have to be normal?
If your son is doing something that relaxes or pleases him without doing harm to people around him, then let him be.
There may be an underlying problem that makes him want to wear the diapers or he may be a diaper lover. No one has yet to explain how a person can be attracted to diapers and baby things. Some say it is a matter of regression, others say it might be caused by not getting enough attention while a child. Who knows- who cares?
A lot time has passed since the first post- does anyone know the current status of our diaper wearing teen?

cid
25082

my kid wets the bed alot so we put waterproof sheet on it , he wear diaper to bed, but now want to wear diaper 24/7 , he is 12, so i let him , and i change him when i am home , my wife is does not like changing him in public , one time he wet his pants and he was not wearing a diaper that day so my wife took to the restroom put him in a new diaper , he had to walk out of the store in just a diaper on. coz we did not bring a change of pants

cid
25187

This is an Interesting post as I have the same interest. I am 14. And people are right. What is the difference. It does not hurt anything. And you do feel peaceful while wearing them. It is almost like you don't have to bother doing anything. You can sit back and watch that re-run of family guy. I never did have a problem with bedwetting or anything. I just feel comfortable. It doesn't make me different, any more than the fact that so-and-so has glasses. it is just a part of who I am.

cid
25222

I agree with your disagreement. I happen to like the same thing. And I did not think this was as common as It is. I am 14 and have no problems with wetting the bed or anything like that. I just feel comfortable while wearing them. I do not wear them all of the time. But this post has given me a lot of confidence in that It is not abnormal or weird to like diapers.

cid
25223

jfromseville, the discussion here was about pre-teens wearing diapers because they enjoyed doing so. I agree with you, and am glad that the issue you spoke of seems to be resolved with age.

cid
25835