Defiant 13 Year Old Boy - FamilyEducation
Defiant 13 Year Old Boy
09/17/2011 at 19:39 PM

I'm an aunt.. not a parent but my father has custody over my two nephews due to some unfortunate circumstances. My younger nephew just turned 13 in July and he's a very stubborn, but very intelligent young man. We had him tested for asperger's syndrome because of how he is but the test were negative. He's defiant and if he doesn't want to do something he sees no need to do it. This includes taking notes in class because he's already getting an A on work, but gets sent to the principal often for defiant behavior.

We tried to take him to a therapist but once again he tells us No and refuses to talk. He won't open up to anyone, he's a great kid but he's very stubborn. We're at a loss of what to do with him! The school is saying that if he continues his defiant behavior they are going to suspend him and if even after that they are going to end up expelling him!

I really am at a loss of what to do. He can't even make friends well because he's unaccommodating to anyone and to be honest he can be very selfish.

All thirteen year old boys are tough - if they weren't, there would be something wrong. They always want to be around their fathers since they are growing out of childhood. This is all just my opinion, coupled with advice from my own therapist, who I am seeing all because of my son's age. If you push him too hard, he will pull further away from you. What about some incentives? That is the only way we are getting my son to get his Homework done. If its not all done and turned in, he doesn't get the things he wants: friends sleeping over, skateboarding park trips, etc. Hope this helps you - basw