PC online activity - FamilyEducation
PC online activity
07/23/2010 at 10:10 AM

I recently installed this program (Family Cyber Alert) which gives me visability to what my kids are doing online, and I feel better having it. My good friend wonders if I'm overstepping privacy that my kids should have. I don't plan to read their private conversations - just have a better handle of the things they are doing so I can ask the right questions, and caution and guide them where they need it.

My feeling is that there is so much junk kids can get into online, some of it potentially leading to trouble - predators, cyberbullying, porn, embarrassment... that I need to make some effort to better monitor what they're getting into.

I certainly monitor what they do in the real world as best as I can, but with the Internet it's too easy for them to get into anything, where there are no boundaries.

Plus, after seeing what some kids put on facebook, it doesn't seem like privacy is much of a concern for them, in fact, maybe they need to learn when to keep some things a little more private.

Don't get me wrong - I talk with them about their PC activities, I have some rules, and they are good kids, but still kids who haven't fully developed good judgement or fully appreciate possible consequences (it won't happen to me!)...I like the idea of having a little help on this one. They are so technology savvy compared to me, it's hard to keep up. I guess some parents might use this tool the wrong way, and you do have to be careful with the trust issue, but I'm letting my kids know I have it and how I intend to use it.

Sorry for my long ramblings. Any other thoughts on this?

Minor children are entitled to parental supervision and parental input. Not privacy. 'Cause they are immature and inexperienced and can get into a dicey situation before they know it. And then the horrified parent stands there wringing her hands (or his hands) and says, "I had no idea this was going on." And the rest of us smugly think that we have a good relationship with our kids...until it's our turn to be horrified.

I agree with your response regarding privacy. I'm always surprised when I hear parents so strongly advocating the privacy and making a direct connection between that and trust of our children. I love my children, I trust them in many ways, but as you say, they are young, inexperienced, and their curiosity and feeling immortal is not yet appropriately checked by the wisdom and experience of real world outcomes...and therefore, no, I do not yet fully trust their judgement. That is partly why they still live with me, not out there on their own.

Totally agree with you here too. Of course as our children grow they will be allowed more freedom [again within boundaries and subject to agreement]. It is more than 'right' to be concerned about our children's safety way more than theoretical privacy. Nigel Lane Parent and Adolescent Coach Author of A Better Way - 101 Practical Ways to Motivate Your Child http://www.motivatemychild.com