Obsessed with monitoring 15 yr old daughters realtionship
12/02/2010 at 08:58 AM

I seem to be obsessed with my 15yr old daughter's relationship--just as others are with their daughter's as I have read on here.
This is her 1st "real" boyfriend and I really like him. He is perfect for her. She didnt even know who he was at school...he saw her and then just chased after her. After time talking to him, she realized she liked him and now they are together.
He is very affectionate and complimentary to her etc..he even tells her he thinks he is falling in love with her. They have been together a month or so.
He was so into txtg her and talking to her constantly in the beginning. During school and at night. Now he seems like he doesnt want to as much. She worries about it and gets upset which in turn gets me upset.
I get crazy about it and I check the phone log to see if he has contacted her or not daily. IT drives me insane. I check his FBook thru her FBook as well.
I feel stupid..but I dont want my daughter taken advantage of :/
I guess Im just so afraid of him hurting her and I try to advise her on what to do to keep him and not let him run over her at the same time. She gets mad at me at times. I dont want to impose my views on what I think is happening in their relatioship. I want her and I want her to handle it herself...but its so hard to stand by and not say anything.
I just dont understand why he would be so overly attentive with the txtg/calling and then just back off so much??? Its confusing to her and to me. I dont know much about teen boys and how they do so maybe thats why I dont understand.
It doesnt help that I really like him alot and that I would be really upset myself if they broke up--as I know my daughter would truly be too.
Whats wrong with me and why do I care so much..I know others will like her and she will have more boyfriends. I dont doubt that she is a beautiful girl inside and out.
I just want her to be with him. I just feel he is a perfect fit for her and I approve so much of him being her boyfriend.
What should I do from this point? How can I be the mom she needs me to be and still help her with her realtionship if I cant stop obsessing on their realtionship? She talks to me about openly now and I dont want that to stop.
I just want him to be everything he seemed to be I guess..and I truly think he is. I just think he isnt mature enough yet to understand how to be in a realtionship.
How do I help my daughter understand that without driving myself crazy and her???