Is this normal please help! - FamilyEducation
Is this normal please help!
02/19/2011 at 12:55 PM

My 3 almost for year old son who I very normal very loved has a great personality just recently has been playing with his neighbor friend who is the same age, anyway they were playing in my sons room and I heard them say "I love you honey...I love you too" then heard kissing so I went in him room and caught them both with there pants down and they quickly pulled them up and when I asked what they were doing the said they were just playing. I had a long talk with my son after I ssent the other boy home and explained to my son that you should not do those things and so on and so forth. Well I thought we were good but then I catch them again but this time they r in his closet andy son was the only one with his pants down. When asked what they were doingy son said "he pulled my pants down and touched me" I asked if he wanted to do that and said no....I am at a loss with this situation. Is this normal or should I seek counseling?

You should definitely talk to the other parents. They need to know that this happened while their son was in your care. Whether your son learned this behavior from their boy or from another friend, from now on you need to closely supervise your boy, because now he may pass this behavior to other children. I don't think counseling is necessary unless your boy is having trouble sleeping/eating/separating from you.

I definantly spoke with the other mom both times it happened. He has had trouble seperating from my husband and I... He won't go to his grandpaents oru sister-in-laws anymore unless we r going with him I just thought it was a phase. He is just scaring us, he opens the doors and goes outside without permission and he just keeps doing it even after we put a chain on the door...I watch him like a hawk if I turn for a second he is off being confused! He is such a good child until recently.

Find out if something inappropriate happened at either of the relatives' houses. If a family member has taught him this behavior, you must report that person to the police immediately. This is for two reasons. 1, it protects children in the community. 2. It gives your child a sense of control and safety. Those children who have seen that the people who take advantage go to jail generally have better mental health than those who see that those people have no consequences, at least in the cases that I have known about. If something inappropriate happened with an adult or older child, you do need to seek therapy.