Bullies - FamilyEducation
04/08/2010 at 12:35 PM

Hi my grandaughter is 16 month loves to go outside and play. I love taking walks with her and watching her explore. she like looking at plants, flowers cars passing by. She loves interacting with children.
Well now to my question a couple of days ago we were outside and my neighbor has two children she gets very excited when they come outside and play even though they do not pay much attention to her. they are about 4 and 3
Finally the 3 year old child was alone and wanted to play with alicia (my grandaughter)
I was playing ball with both of them and when i turned to grab the ball the little girls ran up to my grandaughter and pushed her with both hands. needless to say she fell back and started crying. her mom was close by and did not say anything. now everytime we go outside and this little girl is outside Alicia runs inside. I would like some advise as to how to handle this.
Even though i am the grandmother and i should know how to handle this i don't. I talked to my daughter and her husband about it and they told me she has been her usual self when they take her to the park or close to other children.
Hope someone has some advise thanks for reading

Did you handle it ?

Hi there. In my experience w/ my own children, if something like this was to happen, I wld always intervene by first making sure no one was hurt, then by pulling the parent aside and telling them what happened. Many times the parent just wasn't paying attention and didn't see the incident. If the parent blew it off or got upset with me, I wld deal w/ the child directly if the incident occured again. Many times this wasn't the case and the parent wld talk to his/her child, but sometimes parents get offended. Your main priority is to keep your granddaughter safe. Ultimately, parents and caregivers shld work together to fix the situation and try to redirect the children or teach them how to play appropriately. I don't believe the children shld be separated from the start b/c then how will they learn how to handle these conflicts? Do you get what I'm saying? Obviously if you see the other child/children are continuing to play inappropriately, it may be in your best interest to have your granddaughter avoid playing w/ these children and have her play w/ kids who are in her same age bracket. All kids have conflicts, and all kids need to LEARN how to resolve these conflicts. Parents need to understand this. You can't expect every kid to interact perfectly together w/ no direction, especially at this age. At 3 yrs old, I wldn't consider a child to be a bully b/c honestly he/she doesn't know better. If the kid was a few yrs older, then I wld expect more from that child. It is so important to have kids play and learn together at a young age and for parents to mold their children so they can build positive social relationships. Your granddaughter seems like a wonderful little girl. Enjoy her, especially at this age. Time flies so quickly. Have fun, and best of luck!

thanks you so much for your advise. I will try your advise and see what happens.

Good luck!

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