College Rejection - FamilyEducation
College Rejection
05/09/2007 at 11:21 AM

My 17 year old daughter has always been a very disciplined and motivated student.  She gets straight As, and participates in numerous after-school activities.  She applied to a few ivy-league colleges for the Fall, and so far she has been rejected by four schools.  She was accepted by her safety, which is a very respectable university, but she is not dealing well with all of this rejection.  She has never "failed" at anything before and she suddenly feels depressed and insecure.  How can I help her regain her confidence?  

Hey Cocoa


I was rejected for my first choice of colleges and I was so depressed and just thought that my life was over.  But, I am so glad I went where I did, I met my husband there and it turned out to be a much better fit for me than the other school.


Maybe if you talked to her about how she will be on the path she is suppose to be on and that if she was meant to go to the other schools then she would have gotten in---that sometimes a rejection can be a serious blessing in disguise.  As the Garth Brooks song goes "some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers"  Rejection is hard but it is a part of life and something that we all have to learn to deal with, if she has made it to 17 without feeling much of it then she has made it a lot farther than most of us do!


Tell her to keep her chin up and that she will be so happy at whatever college she chooses to go to and that it will be one of the greatest experiences of her life!  Also, you might want to point out to her that college applications are up in record numbers this year and that percentages of kids not getting into these schools is also at an all-time high.  At least then she will know that she is not alone.


Keep us posted!




Hi Cocoa


Your daughter is definitely not alone.  The competition for ivy league schools is drastically different now than it was even five years ago - it gets more and more fierce every year.  The NYTimes covered this in an article titled, "Young, Gifted, and not Getting Into Harvard." Download the piece and give it to your daughter so that she can know that she joined the ranks of many other extraordinary, talented, and brilliant kids.