Help! Forgive and forget or just forget??? In-law problems.
07/28/2011 at 15:55 PM

Okay Im new here and I need immediate advice, My husband & I have been married for 9 yrs. I've always had problems with my in-laws, but specially with one of my sister in laws. At first we were very good friends. But lately we haven't been speaking at all. There has been a series of arguments between us, She has insulted me,and disrespected me and my children.
For that reason, I have stopped visiting my in-laws just to avoid a fight or me having to rush out the house crying. I have tried to forget about stuff she's done to me in the past for the sake of my husband's happiness, but there she goes again treating me like a piece of trash. Well, here's the thing, She is now in a battle with cancer... she's been going thru a series of treatments for about 2 years now. My husband is very depressed because she is just getting worse and worse. I've kept my distance and haven't talked to her thru these hard times because I was just tired of the same story repeat itself over & over. But now that she is in a very serious condition, God forgive me but I can't help but to feel sorry for her. Inside of me I want to forget once again about everything but I can't just do it because I'm afraid if God forbid something happens to her. I'm so confused. She also has never apologized in any way. Like if that's important now. How can I go to her hospital bed like nothing? What do I say? I feel so bad. Please, any words might help me. Any Advice on how to confront this situation? I really don't want to regret anything later in life.

Do your best to be calm, and try to distract and soothe your daughter.


I have always been upfront and honest with my kids. I trust them enough to be able to deal with whatever is happening, and in return they trust me. Tell your daughter that a storm is coming; animals have a safe place to go, and so do people. If you’re anxious about this or fear that she will not be able to deal with it, you will not help her. Let her learn to cope with reality while she is young. Too many kids are raised in a sterile and emotionally unrealistic environment, it prepares them for nothing.


My youngest son was extremely anxious about going to the dentist. When we found out he had a cavity I told him that he would have to get a filling. When we arrived for the appointment he became very upset. For 15 minutes the hygienist and the dentist start spinning yarns about “sugar bugs” and calling the drill a “spin brush”. I interrupted the conversation and told him what was happening and that the worst of it is the pinch you feel when they give the Novocain shot. The dentist and hygienist both were upset with me, but I could care less. He knew they were lying and that only elevated his anxiety. He calmed down, sat back, and we were out of there in 30 minutes.