Sleeping with Children... - FamilyEducation
Sleeping with Children...
01/09/2011 at 11:40 AM

My boyfriends son will be 4 next month and he (my boyfriend) insist on sleeping with him despite my objections.
Initially it started out as him not wanting his son to wake up alone in a strange place; I agreed and encouraged it, at the time. Months later it is still going on and I hate it.
He doesn't have to tell me that his reason for doing it is because he is trying to spend every moment he can with his son while he is here; I know him well enough to know that's what it is, and I give him credit for loving his son that much, but is this going to continue for a year, 2 years, indefinitely?
I genuinely believe that continuing this behavior is eventually going to create confusion in the boy when the time does come for his father to stop sleeping with him. Not to mention, how is he going to take me seriously if he doesn't see us functioning as a "normal" couple? His mother is also in a relationship and sleeping with her is out of the question.
I realize other cultures have differing views on sleeping arrangements; I have read everything I can find on the subject, however, I can't help but feel like once the child goes to bed it should be time for the grown-ups.
Any advice on the subject would be appreciated.

Agree with you. Insist on breaking this habit now.

It will cause no more confusion than giving up a comfort object (stuffed animal, blankie). It will happen naturally at some point. The child has to live in two different homes with two sets of rules. That may cause some confusion. If you don't wish to accommodate this priority of your boyfriend, arrange for separate housing.