Lately my daughter has been telling me things that are a little disturbing. While I feel good about her being comfortable enough to talk to me, I'm a little worried. So far I think I've kept my cool so she doesn't feel like a freak. Afterall, some of it is natural curiosity and I want her to continue to feel comfortable about talking to me about anything.
The reason I'm worried is because, being a female, I don't remember having these kind of thoughts until I was at least 10! Maybe I just don't remember? Of course nowadays our children are exposed to so much more at younger ages.
So here's what she's told me so far. It started off innocently enough....she was upset about having some dream about seeing her father naked. I assured her that was normal. Then she had another one where "his thing", as she called it, was orange and fell off. Ok, so I made her see the humor in that. She has a new found facination with the way her private looks....ok normal right...but she confessed to me today that she wants to show it to everyone. I told her that was wrong, privates are private yada, yada. She said she's kissed the dogs private (boy dog), ewww, yeah...so of course that last secret made me ask why she would think it's OK to kiss privates. Wouldn't you think she's seen something or other kids are talking about oral sex, or godforbid someone did something to her?! So I drill her and tell her that sometimes adults do inappropriate things to children and may scare them to keep secret like threatening to kill them, their family, etc., and that it's a lie and to definately tell me if that ever happens/ed....a speech I've given many times. She's assured me that she hasn't seen anything and that no one has touched her. I believe her.
She is very upset over the thoughts she's having because she does know it's not appropriate. She did have an incident at our house a few months ago when a boy from school (whom we know for a couple of years) came over for a play date. He wanted to show each other their privates and she ran crying to her daddy and told him, who then sat them both down to talk about the innapropriateness of doing such a thing. I have just been reassuring her that these thoughts are normal and the more she worries about them the more it's going to bother her and linger in her mind. I guess I want to hear someone out there tell me it is all normal and what if anything else I should do or say.
P.S. She is an only child, has a 14 y/o step sister who does not live with us and very mature for her age.
Feedback/Advice would be very appreciated.