I don't know how to get along with my older daughter - FamilyEducation
I don't know how to get along with my older daughter
07/07/2011 at 12:02 PM

I need help so bad! My 33 year old daughter moved to CA. which is 3000 miles away from me, about 2 yrs ago with her boyfriend and baby. It has been killing me every since she took my 3 yr. old grandbaby away from me and his Paw Paw. I watched him since he was born everyday while she worked. We have a very close bond, my grandson and i.I am just a nerves wrek and depressed all the time, i miss him so much it hurts! He is my only grandbaby, she is my only daughter.Anyway her and I have fought on the phone and through e-mail every since she moved. Her boyfriend never worked, she had a great paying job, and just up and left it, for him! He loves it there because you can get pot and grow it very easy there. She promised me she would move back before he started school, so i could be a part of that and his child hood life. She lied. She gets very mad at me because i tell her she just stays there for her boyfriend and his drugs! She calls me all kinds of nasty bad names and says she hates me and that she is never coming back. We can never just talk, no matter what i say, it's wrong and she always takes stuff i say the wrong way. After 3 minutes of talking she starts screaming at me and hangs up. It upsets me so much because she does this right in front of my grandson. I feel like she is emotional abusing him. She really needs help. I worry constantly about my grandbaby. I'm scared he is around the drugs and he may even start on them when he is 10 or so, since he is around his dad when he smokes it or plants it. Please can anyone tell me what i can do? I love her, but i do not agree with her living so far away, especially in a state where drugs are so easy to get! Please help, last night she got so mad at me, she told me that i could never talk to my grandbaby again. He is my world!

How do you know that her boyfriend prefers CA because it's easier to get pot there?

Perhaps he likes CA because the child-care they can afford there is provided by someone who doesn't bad-mouth him. Children do better in homes with both biological parents. In the absence of both biological parents, the next best thing is to have the support of extended family, but perhaps both your daughter and her boyfriend wanted the best for their child, not the next-best. You could tell your daughter that you have realized that your bad attitude toward her boyfriend was absolutely wrong, and that you are sorry.